embraced by Grace

I’ve been thinking about authenticity lately...living life in an authentic way....being real.

I realize that I’m not the only one, as this mantra of “Be yourself” seems to define so much of my own generation. I use the word mantra intentionally; there is a conflict of wanting so much to be “the real you” and also wanting to form what you think should be “the real you” that such an incantation is a needed reminder. We live between the sung phrases of “be authentic” and also “be perfect”, trying to make them both true. By no means do I intend to make light of this conflict. I think it is a reality, even and maybe especially, within Christian circles. I struggle with this conflict myself, and it is something I continue to wrestle out with Jesus.

I long to be real; to be ok with who I am. Even when I mess up - and.....sin.
But there is this other part of me that longs to prove to God that I’m worth His saving me.
Ok, before you pick up the cyber stones to throw at me for bad theology, I’m just stating how I feel, and even more than just feeling, how I perceive things at times.

So what do we do in the middle? How is that we can be real, transparent with ourselves, before God and other people? How is that we seek to live in such a way that pursue after the heart of God? How do we struggle - and see victory - in the battle against the expectation of perfection?

God is so amazingly gracious with us. Even as I was writing that previous sentence, I had the thought that those words don’t even come close to portraying God’s relations toward us. It sounds so cliche, so mundane; kind of like something I’ve heard a billion times. And probably will need to hear at least a billion more. It’s easy to forget that God is so incredibly full of grace towards us that there is no way He could run out of grace. It’s impossible; an impossibility of which we are most certain the beneficiaries. It’s this grace that leads to repentance. Knowing that God is so gracious helps us to be transparent with Him. We don’t have to lie to ourselves about who we really are or hide from God. Adam and Eve tried that and it didn’t work so well for them. God knew that they had disobeyed. God also anticipated they would and provided a sacrifice.

I realize that this whole thing isn’t something to just be resolved in a blog post. As I’ve said in one form or another - at least a handful of times on this blog ;) - it is a process. So for now, I want to focus on the fact that often God is not who perceive him to be. I forget that He loves me more I know and offers more grace than I can comprehend.

“So then, since we have a great High Priest who has entered heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to what we believe. This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for He faced all of the same testings we do, yet He did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.” Hebrews 4:14-16